In many ways there have been far too many Lents for me to remember all my learning, the struggles, revelations and memories; and I represent much of the younger demographic that attends church these days. Perhaps like me, you may have had struggles to figure out your Lenten discipline from year to year. What does one sacrifice? What book will one read? How intentional will I hope to be in my service in the parish, in the wider community? This Lent I find myself reflecting on previous years. I won’t be cycling to all my pastoral visits, nor will I be abstaining from specific foods or beverages. Labours for me will be both internal and external in nature, as I continue to walk a rule of life that remains in tune with the Creator and the created.
Since 2017 I’ve had a thumb Labyrinth that I keep in my pocket. I use it to augment my prayer, to keep me both focused and open as I move through the different parts of my day, my life. At times of stress and anxiety I find myself grasping it, silently praying through times when it’s hard to stay present to myself, to others, or to God. Some seasons it has been a constant companion to my activities, at other times it almost lies forgotten, even getting laundered with my clothes on the odd occasion.
This year I have approached each day as if I am walking the labyrinth constantly. Though I am only physically walking Kaslo’s labyrinth once a week, I am approaching each day of Lent in prayer and contemplation, awaiting, and welcoming Christ’s presence in the rhythm of my life.
Each day I am finding time in my rhythm to Pray, Read, Serve, and Be. These intentional actions help me to remain in communication and communion with God, with my learning, with the community, and with myself. As I move through my rhythm of corporate worship, private prayer, intentional learning, serving others and meditation, I hope to find the path, to hear the voice, to breathe the air where God needs me to be.
Pastoral ministry as a priest for me has always been a journey of changing landscapes, navigating differing feelings and emotions, and struggling to understand others. At times I have tried to control environments, and manage expectations such that everything would fit nicely into a little ‘box’ that was simple to define, easy to address, and manageable to act upon. In other words, either consciously or unconsciously, I wanted control and order.
Jesus’ wilderness sojourn in the gospels is anything but orderly and controlled, as is life. Though we long for order and safety, the world doesn’t always show up the way we would want it. Medical diagnoses, accidents, community tragedies, unexpected events, and global trends rarely follow completely as I would want them to. The more I live, the more I recognize the unpredictability of life.
And yet, amid the unforeseen there are rhythms and patterns that we can choose to hold to: Breath and heartbeat, wax and wane of the moon, sun’s crest, seasons unfolding. These last few years I have used these rhythms to centre my life, my prayer, when perhaps all the rest of life was spinning apart. The thumb labyrinth found its place in my rhythm as a touch stone, urging me to stay grounded, to remember the natural rhythms of life, which are gifts from God.
So now, on the journey of forty days, I let each day unfold as if I am walking the labyrinth. I journey through the twists and turns of my days, enveloped in the breath and the rhythm of prayer. I walk to the centre of my day, and in the midst of the confusion, challenge, angst, or joy, strive to find the Holy One. I trace my path, reminded that each day God shows up in my prayer, my learning, my serving, and my being. I walk inward in prayer and meditation, staying observant of the presence of Christ in friend and stranger, family and enemy around me. I loose demand for control of my situation and embrace uncertainty knowing that I am not alone, and have a purpose to be living life in the here and now. In the evenings I find a way through breath and meditation to exit the labyrinth of my daily journey, so to rest and be, in preparation for tomorrow.
How are you observing a Holy Lent? What disciplines and practices will bring you to encounter holiness in this season? What labour will you complete to enter into the Passion and meet Christ in Easter Celebrations?
